Thursday, December 20, 2007

I Took a Shot and Didn't Even Come Close

It's like we had completely separate experiences. that part still blows me away. Dr. Everything'll Be All Right asked me if i've cried about this. i haven't. well, i did get choked up and teary when i saw Regina Spektor sing "On the Radio" at Bridge School. but i haven't had the really good cry. yet. and i think it's because it's such a big deal. and not even about him. but about me breaking the cycle of offering myself to men who are uninterested and unavailable. and breaking the cycle of accepting whatever those men are willing to give as enough. amidst the pain there is a definite numbness, but also an underlying breath of fire that tells me i'm alive and on the right path.

Please put the doctor on the phone 'cause I'm not making any sense
Blame everyone but me for this mess
And my back has been breaking from this heavy heart
We never seemed so far
I'm hopelessly hopeful, you're just hopeless enough
But we never had it at all

And the record won't stop skipping
And the lies just won't stop slipping
And besides my reputation's on the line
We can fake it for the airwaves
Force our smiles, baby, half dead
From comparing myself to everyone else around me
to everyone else around me
everyone else around me
everyone else around me


(thanks FOB...)

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2008 concerts

  • Metro Station The Wiltern 7/19
  • George Michael The Forum 6/25
  • Panic at the Disco Anaheim 6/14
  • Panic at the Disco L.V. 6/13
  • Heloise & the Savior Faire 6/8
  • Mandy Moore Hotel Cafe L.A. 5/23
  • Panic at the Disco S.F. 4/11
  • Panic at the Disco S.F. 4/10
  • Panic at the Disco Jimmy Kimmel 3/25
  • Really, Really Ridiculously Good Looking Tour L.V. 2/17
  • Really, Really Ridiculously Good Looking Tour L.A. 2/16
  • Rufus Wainwright L.A. 2/12